靖，该长大了

goodnight world. :'(

reality hits.

didn't realise i'll be faced with such situation.
didn't realise that i'll have to face sthg that i don't want to, so soon.

it just..gets better, each time ......

猜不透

五月天 - 你不是真正的快樂

Lyrics 歌詞:

作詞：五月天 作曲：五月天

人 群中 哭著
你隻想變成透明的顏色
你再也不會夢 或痛 或心動了
你已經決定了 你已經決定了

你 靜靜 忍著
緊緊把昨天在拳心握著
而回憶越是甜 就是 越傷人了
越是在 手心留下 密密麻麻 深深淺淺 的刀割

你不是真正的快樂 你的笑隻是你穿的保護色
你決定不恨了 也決定不愛了
把你的靈魂關在永遠鎖上的軀殼

這 世界 笑了
於是你合群的一起笑了
當生存是規則 不是 你的選擇
於是你 含著眼淚 飄飄蕩蕩 跌跌撞撞 的走著

你不是真正的快樂 你的笑隻是你穿的保護色
你決定不恨了 也決定不愛了
把你的靈魂關在永遠鎖上的軀殼

你不是真正的快樂 你的傷從不肯完全的愈合
我站在你左側 卻像隔著銀河
難道就真的抱著遺憾一直到老了 然后才后悔著

你不是真正的快樂 你的笑隻是你穿的保護色
你決定不恨了 也決定不愛了
把你的靈魂關在永遠鎖上的軀殼

你不是真正的快樂 你的傷從不肯完全的愈合
我站在你左側 卻像隔著銀河
難道就真的抱著遺憾一直到老了

你值得真正的快樂 你應該脫下你穿的保護色
為什麼失去了 還要被懲罰呢
能不能就讓 悲傷全部 結束在此刻 重新開始活著

quite true isnt it. haa..tsk.

sthg i got in my inbox today.

Quote for the day:

'Whatever you give a woman, she is going to multiply. If you give her sperm, she'll give you a baby. If you give her a house, she'll give you a home. If you give her groceries, she'll give you a meal. If you give her respect and kindness, she'll give you her heart. She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her. So - if you give her any crap, she will give you a ton of shit.'

trudge on warrior.

feels good getting 'stuffs' outta the chest. whatever it is...its out. whether the ending is as my heart's desire, or not. the point is, i know, i've done everything in my power. and that is good enough, for i've tried. no regrets.

Opening my heart to someone doesn't always have to be a frightening experience. I show my affections and opine it as a truth im stating, not as a risk im taking. anyway, bottomline is.. i feel good now.

after so long, i've finally had a hearty meal. my appetite's back..and im back in chillin' mode. yeah i've yet to secure a job, and it seems at this point in time, a rather bleak outlook. add on to the fact that dad jus did sthg 'clever' again...was rather affected..but que sara sara. i'll take it a step at a day.

out of control~!

pimple outbreak!! exasperated!!!

i think been too stressed + lack of sleep.

time to pig out.

decision just proved right.

lesson learnt today: never doubt myself.

depressive realism

-- is the theory that depressed people get into the state they are in because they somehow see the world with greater clarity, and thus more accurately. you don't have to be a genius to tell that this was something i held true since i was very young. through the lens of adolescent angst, it seemed so correct, so perfect. of course that's why i'm unhappy. it's because i'm smarter. haa.

so now that we're grown, and can look back on those times with a mixture of amusement and disgust, we can ask ourselves: what's a more mature formulation of that theory? well, the model is not exactly true - it doesn't predict depression. people get depressed for a whole load of reasons, but just as many dumb people get it as insightful ones. however, if you only study people who do not meet diagnostic criteria for the illness, the pattern re-emerges: the happier a person is, the more deluded he tends to be (it's not a trivial correlation either). so here's a rare case of intuition being borne out by statistics, and the cynical viewpoint actually being sort of correct. life sucks, and you get happy by believing that it doesn't - there's a big problem with this, though. thought experiment: you invent a brand of therapy where people actively learn how to be ignorant. not CBT, not monitoring cognition, or filtering thought processes, but actively pursuing ignorance. my guess: not too many people lining up at the psychologist's door.

..in other words, your way might make you feel better, but it also might be less accurate.

it's the old sheryl crow thing.

you know

if it makes you happy,
it can't be that bad.
if it makes you happy,
then why the hell are you so sad?

i realise, that one of the worst feelings is being helpless- especially when the thing tt is not in yr control and is not fated by u, affects u directly AND deeply.

now, the worst thing is waiting.

quotable quotes.

The limits of your language are the limits of your world.--Ludwig Wittgenstein

What a distressing contrast there is between the radiant intelligence of the child and the feeble mentality of the average adult.--Sigmund Freud

Genius is nothing but continued attention.-- Claude A. Helvetius

Patience is a necessary ingredient of genius.--Benjamin Disraeli

In view of the fact that God limited the intelligence of man, it seems unfair that he did not also limit his stupidity.--Dean Acheson

If the world should blow itself up, the last audible voice would be that of an expert saying it can't be done.--Peter Ustinov

One of the surest signs that intelligent life exists in outer space is that none of it has tried to contact us.--Normandy Alden

People demand freedom of speech as a compensation for the freedom of thought which they seldom use.--Kierkegaard

There's a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.--Steven Wright

note to self.

no matter what the cost, and no matter how deep the grief, even in a battle that appears to be hopeless..


battle on, fight the good fight.

Always bear in mind that your own resolution to succeed is more important than any one thing.--Abraham Lincoln